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How to Survive Having Children

Our 18-year-old daughter, Doreen, had babysat a number of times for a young motherand her husband from our church. They have two very small daughters, about 7 months and 2 years in age. I had to smile when this mother told me how she responded when her husband asked her what she wanted for Christmas.

"I want Doreen," this stay-at-home Mom requested. She wanted Doreen to just come and play with the girls for a few hours several times in the hectic weeks before Christmas so that she could finish her shopping, go out to lunch, or just have some time away from the children.

Her plea brought back memories of just how harried and desperate for time away from toddlers I used to be, too. I remember a difficult moment in which I practically threw infant Doreen into the arms of my husband saying something like "You take care of her. I've had it." Doreen was not hurt in that exchang,e but I do remember thinking about how easy it would be to cross the line and physically take out frustration, tiredness and postpartum hormones on a child.

For those first several months when Doreen was a baby, we had three children, ages four and under. We had periods of time with two in diapers. At dinner time, often the only way to eat in peace was to put the baby in the infant swing and let it work its hypnotic magic. The stress of young children all adds up to a giant need for the primary child caretaker to have some time away to regroup and recharge. It is important for the couple to get away together too, for the same reasons.

Having two or more children increases the complexity of issues surrounding childcare exponentially. Add in one or two careers or jobs and the complications grow.

Most Christian parents that I know say they couldn't survive, whether their kids are 2, 12, or 22, without the strength found in prayer. It's nice to have a place to go with our worries.

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Contributed by Melodie Davis from her weekly columnANOTHER WAY (http://www.thirdway.com/aw/).For information on using Another Way in a local newspaper, contact:ANOTHER WAY, 1251 Virginia Ave., Harrisonburg, VA 22801-2497; or call1-800-999-3534; fax at 540-434-5556; or email me at:Melodie@mennomedia.org

 


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