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A Matter of Honor

My father couldn't care for his three children after my mother went to the hospital when I was seven years old. That is why my brother, sister, and I spent most of our childhood years in foster homes. My father, sadly, was not an honorable man and let his problems control his life.

In order to protect me from identifying with my father, my mother told me that although I was a "Jr.", I was not named after my father. She said that my first name was really spelled with one "n" and not two. A few years ago, however, I found out that I really was named after father and my first name was spelled with two "n"s as in: Glenn Howard White Jr. After a brief disillusionment with maternal protection, I realized what I must do for my father. As a matter of honor, I must begin carrying his name.

I will never forget the moment when I was driving on the highway and promised God I would use my given name as a way of honoring my father. It was a simple spontaneous act of obedience to God and His Word: "Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise) so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth" (Ephesians 6:2-3). It was then God whispered gently into my heart, "Glenn, do you realize that the only honor your father may ever receive is what you give him?" Then I understood that my father, created in the image of God, deserved honor. While it's true that my father didn't care for me like a father should, that did not nullify or diminish my responsibility to honor him.

At the moment I decided to honor my father, a strange, unexplicable missing piece of my identity snapped into place. It was one of those rare experiences that no one can understand unless they have experienced that same sensation of sudden wholeness. I would be cheapening the moment to glamorize or sensationalize this experience, but will only say it was very real.

I know that there are many valid reasons and explanations why sons and daughters do not honor their fathers; sometimes because of paternal abuse, neglect, or simple imperfections. I have discovered, however, that a matter of honor is a simple matter of obedience. That is why I honor my father and I feel honored to be his son. Of course, God is right again... it is well with me... just like Ephesians says.

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Contributed by Glenn Howard White Jr.
You may email Glenn at this address:glenn@writetoinspire.com
or read more of his writing here:www.writetoinspire.com

 


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