An Experiment on Giving

"We do not quite forgive a giver. The hand that feeds us is in danger of being bitten." - Emerson

As a much younger woman, I recall I had a hard time taking a compliment. Somehow, I had this notion it was a sign of conceit to just accept these well-meant affirmations. It was only until a friend became infuriated with my making excuses whenever I received a compliment, that I quickly learned to accept the true sentiment of the kind words spoken. Unfortunately, the lesson did not sink in as well as I thought, for as I grew older, and came to experience more of life's up's and down's, I began to sometimes grow suspicious of the gestures of other's. I thought perhaps they wanted something of me, rather than truly trying to give out of the sincere contents of their godly heart.

I am not alone in this occasional inability to simply accept the gift of the giver graciously, and without suspicion. Any one who has been betrayed by a friend or suffered unfair treatment at the hands of an associate or loved one, is less apt to handle good and godly giving gestures with the sentiment they are intended. The same is often true with giving. Some times, our giving is stifled because we fear it will draw suspicion, rather than appreciation.We are a people who tend to be very hard on ourselves. We look in the mirror and seek flaw before beauty, wondering how any one could ever find us appealing, be it from a physical, intellectual, or spiritual standpoint. Those who dare to offer a thoughtful word are often looked upon as having some selfish and hidden motive, for, we think, "How can they simply want to give me something JUST for the sake of blessing me?"

We often don't feel worthy enough to accept truths about our self, most likely, because we, ourselves, do not recognize the good in us. How can we love others if we cannot even love ourselves?

In the Bible, we are told the story of how Mary Magdalene washed the feet of Jesus, soothing them then with oil, and wiping them dry with her hair. Our Lord's reaction could have been, "Get away, silly woman! That is not appropriate!" Instead, our Lord accepted the gift, knowing that Mary's intention was to simply soothe the tired feet of her friend who had been walking on the dry, dusty ground for many days.

With this sentiment of giving in mind, I would like to share with you an experiment of sorts I have planned; it concerns my parish Priest, a man who, in my view, is so busy tending to his flock, that he may neglect his own need to be ministered to. I will present to him, substance for his stomach (lunch), but it is his spirit I am seeking to feed instead.As part of this same experiment, I also encourage you to give to someone you think could use a little blessing, be it a friend, loved one, associate or stranger. If kindness is contagious, then surely, the gift of brotherly love can flow like a fountain!

While we are thinking of giving and receiving good gifts, let us also not forgot the most important gift of all, which our Heavenly Father bestowed upon all of mankind. It is the jewel of salvation which is freely set before each of us.

Author's note: I am pleased to announce that my own experiment seemed quite successful as the desired affect of making my parish Priest know his ministry and presence is indeed appreciated. Please feel free to write and share your positive results!

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Contributed by Melanie Schurr (Copyright (c)2003 Melanie Schurr) Melanie Schurr is author of "Ecstatic Living Ecstatic Loving: How to have more peace and joy in marriage, and life in general by walking in harmony with God," and "Son Salutations: A refreshing collection of modern inspirations for those who seek God each day." For more information, visit her web page at www.angelfire.com/mi/melschurr